By Ruth Moss

Over a year ago I wrote a piece for The F Word about Facebook removing pictures of breastfeeding mothers on the grounds of “obscenity”.

Well, nothing’s changed. Facebook still insists on removing pictures of breastfeeding mothers.

Recently, I attended a virtual “nurse-in” in protest about this. It was called MILC which stands for Mothers’ International Lactation Campaign (but also sounds a bit like milk, which is what comes out of a lactating breast). Actually the name is a bit misleading as to join in you neither had to be a mother, nor lactating. All you had to do was put up a picture of a breastfeeding mother; whether that was a photograph or painting – didn’t even have to be human; any mammal would do, and change your status to “Hey, Facebook! Breastfeeding is not obscene!”

My picture:

Hey! Facebook! Breastfeeding is not obscene!

Hey! Facebook! Breastfeeding is not obscene!

It was fun to take part, and much discussion was had on various groups and boards. It seems as though it didn’t make any difference though, as Facebook continues to remove photographs.

Q&A

But surely Facebook has to draw the line somewhere? I can see their point – after all, they’ve just decided to remove all photographs that show a nipple or areola, not just breastfeeding ones.

No, not all photos. Just female nipples / areola.

Oh well, fair enough, but female nipples / areola are the ones that are sexual; male ones aren’t!

Hmm, I know a few men who’d disagree with that.

Well, culturally speaking, I mean. Our culture says female nipples = sex and therefore facebook is right to ban pictures of them.

Yes, but female nipples don’t = sex do they? Actually female nipples and areola are designed with one purpose, one primary purpose anyway, that is, to lactate and suckle young.Lots of things are found sexual by some people – quite a few people are really into feet, for example, but we don’t go around banning photographs of them unshod, and tell people to walk discreetly, do we?

But I heard that female breasts evolved to resemble buttocks so that men would find them sexy! So they are sexual! Nature made them sexy, not like feet! Foot fetishists are, like, weirdos, but breast fetishists are only obeying nature! So there!

Hmm. But even if that is the case, and I’m never totally sure I agree with everything the rather sexist Desmond Morris says, aren’t you forgetting something?

What?

Buttocks don’t have nipples.

And?

Well, even if breasts themselves are designed as secondary sexual characteristics, the nipples aren’t. Facebook isn’t banning pictures of breasts where the nipples are covered (although actually some have been removed), just the ones where they aren’t. Just because some cultures have sexualised the nipple doesn’t make it any less of a fetish. Nothing wrong with fetishes, but who decides which fetishists not to offend?

Well whatever anyway them’s the rules and facebook is free so abide by them. It’s too difficult to police images.

Well, flickr manages it; breastfeeding pictures don’t contravene their policies. Really it’s actually pretty simple. Is there a breast in the picture? Yes. Is there a baby in the picture too, either about to feed, feeding, or having just finished a feed? Yes? Keep. No? Ban. Actually I’m not convinced that pictures of female breasts should be obscene full stop, and the law is with me. Indecent exposure actually only applies to the penis (whether that’s right or not is another matter). But if facebook really wants to ban breasts, but not piss off breastfeeding mothers, then yes, it is simple actually. And it’s a person who decides whether or not a picture is obscene, not a computer programme. A person who can say “that breast has a baby attached, even if you can see the areola, therefore no ban” or “that breast has a penis ejaculating on it, therefore ban”.

And as it happens, actually, facebook has been removing pictures of breastfeeding that don’t contravene its made up policy on areola/nipple exposure. Why would that be? Surely not lactaphobia?

Well, whatever, anyway, why do you want to put these pictures up in the first place! You exhibitionist!

Well, why would anyone want to put a picture of anything up on facebook. Come to it, why take photos at all?

Eh?

Well, personally, for me, I know breastfeeding won’t last forever. It’s a part of my life with my child that I want to remember long after it’s gone, so I take photos of it.

Come on, secretly you’re a bit smug about it, aren’t you? You’re showing off, when there are so many women out there who wanted to breastfeed, but couldn’t.You’re making formula feeding Mums feel bad. And you’re showing your privilege. I mean, lots of Mums can’t breastfeed because they can’t afford to eat enough to produce a milk supply.

I know I’m lucky to be able to breastfeed. I got the right support at the right time. Many don’t. But there’s lots of things I can do because I am lucky, or privileged. I can read, for example. Should I not put up a photo of me reading a book because others don’t have access to education? And as for eating – actually that’s a bit of a myth. A woman would have to be literally at the point of starvation before she couldn’t produce milk. Yes, some women do have a problem with milk supply, but it’s not normally about calorie intake. And anyway, should I not post a photo of me tucking into my xmas dinner because others in the world don’t have enough to eat? Your logic just doesn’t hold true!

And besides, the more we see something, the more it becomes “normal”. At the moment, we just don’t see enough breastfeeding images or breastfeeding mothers in real life. A few more photographs and it might make it a bit more acceptable. Not to mention that the “technical aspects” can be quite difficult to get a hang of at first. Pictures can help!

But… but… I don’t like breastfeeding. I just don’t like it, okay? Because only women (with a few rare exceptions) can do it. And that reinforces gender stereotypes. It puts the majority of the childcare onto the mother. It forces the mother to stay home. It is the tool of the patriarchy! It hurts! It punishes women for having children! It keeps them barefoot and pregnant! Just because it’s natural doesn’t mean it’s right! Formula feeding = equality! Men can get involved! We don’t want the men to be left out! And this stuff about prolactin – - the “mothering hormone” – well isn’t that a teensy bit essentialist anyway?

Or…

I just don’t like breastfeeding, okay? Those breasts are mine! Mine I tell you! I don’t want to see a baby on them! It reminds me that actually they’re not mine after all! <sucks thumb>

Oh, okaaaaay… so you’re saying, you personally dislike breastfeeding because you’re suspicious of it?

Yes.

Because you don’t like the fact only women can do it, or because you feel you have ownership of the breasts?

Yes.

But this is nothing to do with facebook is it?

No.

So shall we have this discussion another time?

Yes.

And agree that actually, facebook shouldn’t be censoring these photographs?

<runs away>